Lightbringer

In a world full of sorrow

With nothing but pain

How can I be kind

With nothing to gain

 

Yet you smile

Like an incandescent dream

Against odds and oddity

In a world miserably mean

 

You show us a path

Forgotten and ignored

And a humble sense of humanity

Once adored

 

My own reflection

Is my worst nightmare

Haunting and daunting

Embodiment of despair

 

Yet you carried this burden

This long, this far

Only to be rewarded with betrayal

At the judgement hour

 

Yet you smile

Like dawn of spring

In a world that treats you

Like a plaything

 

The blame is mine

And I bear it in shame

This guilt, this suffering

My existence, my bane

 

In a darkened world

You’re a speck of light

Which I once cultivated

Now lost, and denied

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RESEMBLANCE- JOURNEY OF A DOPPELGANGER… BY ARTI HONRAO

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REVIEW NO. – 17

NAME : RESEMBLANCE
AUTHOR : ARTI HONRAO
SOURCE : AUTHOR
GENRE : FICTION

RATINGS

STORY : 3/5
COVER : 3.5/5
WRITING STYLE : 4/5
DIALOGUES : 3/5
THEME : 4/5
OVERALL : 3.5/5

TAB’S OVERVIEW

For Sneha seeing Ajay for the first time was the moment of what people say ‘Love At First Sight’. She was ready to do anything for the sake of her love but even in her weirdest nightmare, she never thought that she had to live her life as a doppelganger of Ajay’s first wife.

Sneha’s life turns upside down when she realizes that her face resembles Ajay’s first wife who was taking her last few breaths. Sneha have to take a leap of faith in the maze created by destiny to find her love. She has to take up the challenges and had to take a ride in the river of emotions. After all the hurdles she has to take a decision too, that whether she will accept the love being Sneha or being a person to whom she resembles?

This is a story which is a kind of a roller coaster ride of emotions and feelings. The journey of Sneha as a doppelganger will leave you dumbstruck and on the other hand the love of a mother for her child will freeze your senses.

BEAUTY

  • Cover and theme.
  • Opening scene of the chapter named ‘Resemblance’ when Sneha enters in the ICU.
  • Writing style. Simple and intriguing.
  • Writing the events in two perspectives, one of Sneha and other of Ajay.
  • Secret of Smriti. That’s the point of the storyline when you’ll feel the magic around you.
  • The moment when Shreya says, “Can I have my diary back?”

BEAST

  • Length. It’s a bit lengthy.
  • Repetition of feelings.
  • Story takes on your nerves only at the beginning and at the end. The mid portion is weak.
  • I didn’t like the end. Resemblance should not be lost. Sneha had her own identity and it should have been honored (personal view).
  • Formatting of the book. It’s unusual.
  • Names are similar and create confusion. Smiriti, Sneha, Shreya, all the ladies have their names starting from S.

SANDY’S VIEW

The cover is interesting and so is the blurb. Story is unusual and when you start reading it, instantly, you will be drawn in the magic created by the author through her writing style. But soon the author loses her grip over the story which was at the hike in the beginning and you’ll feel that now the author is stretching the story too much. But there are some magical moments in between those boring pages which will never allow you to put this book down. Shreya is the character to watch. She is suspicious and I’m glad to know ‘Why?’ The secret of Smriti and Shreya makes your read worth.

On a personal view over the story, I didn’t like the author’s decision of giving Sneha a whole new identity at the end of the novel.

My final verdict over the novel is that ‘Resemblance’ is having a simple story with the magical touch of emotions and super natural flavor.

It’s Result Day

That was just a normal day for me till 5:30. I was enjoying the evening with one of the typical classic novel “The winner stands alone” by Poelho choelo. That was a valentine season so as they say love was in the air. But not alone love;there was lot of tittle-tattle of result being out accompanying the love filled air. And we all knew that at the end of the love-result season post result effect will overrule. So valentine season was on the verge of being ruined. Exception is ‘The toppers’.  Gender-magnetism is activated for them in post result era.

I got a call from the most active person of the class. I guess he will be prized for winning the secrete contest-“WHO WILL SEE THE RESULT FIRST”. And in so hurry he conveyed the message to me. So mathematically I was the runner-up of the contest neglecting a few probabilities of seeing the result before me. No sooner did the message fell in my ear my legs rushed to the computer. Opened the site, entered my roll number and a formality to check I am not a robot. I could sense my heartbeat. Loud and clear. It was all there in front of me, i circulated my eyes over the entire page to find the “three digit number”. It was at corner of the page and it displayed “only”say x. I guess the word ‘only’ sufficiently explain the following numeral. As soon as I saw the result, few biological changes began to occur in my body; adrenaline began to flow at faster rate, my inners got all wet by sweat, heartbeat speed was low but intensity was increased and now I could have felt them better. I checked the name twice willing to see a different name but I got only disappointment.

I came out from the room. Sun had completely dropped, Birds had gone to their nests and there was complete darkness.

I was already terrified by the thought of facing the class next day. The horror increased when I got to know the following percentages of my classmates 75, 78, 83, 74, 72, 77. And adding to that, the average % of class had hit the 73. One thing was clear by that I had to prepare my face expression for next day.

“This semester I really worked hard, made some self-notes, attended the classes properly. Still I got this, do I really deserve this?”

“No, you were not regular, your internals were not good, and you hardly attended few quizzes”

I was stupidly arguing with myself. Knowing that this won’t change what had happened.

Whatever has happened has gone. I have two options from here: a) let it go and become dejected or b) show them what you are and what you can be. It’s time to prove yourself. Because as the say: transformation always occurs during the moment of crises.

The Disclosure

The Disclosure

“Windsor Street”
The sign board glimmered in the pale light of passing vehicles.
I was crossing this sign board third time this night. This was probably the most crowded place at this point of time. That’s why I loved crossing this place several times during my night walk. Random faces, random talks.

The weather was calm & clear. The cool breeze tickling through the bare skin served as cherry on the cake.
I wish if ria was here, walking to my side. I would have held her hand & enjoyed the breeze. She is beautiful, beautiful as the full moon in a cold winter’s night. I was in love with her since the first time I saw her. She always appeared the same to me, an angel bestowed by the mighty heavens in my vapid life.

Suddenly it struck me. I took out my cell phone & dialed her number(although it was on speed dial) .
“Tring Tring – Tring Tring – Tring Tring – Tring Tring – Tring Tring. . .”

That was all that I heard. Was she busy? Or maybe she couldn’t find her phone(she always did that, i.e, misplaced her phone). So I tried a second time. No luck!
Maybe she was busy with something or the other. She would call me as soon as she reaches her phone.

These thoughts crowded my mind as I walked across the streets. Suddenly I stumbled into a stone & hurt my toe.
“Damn! The right toe again!”.
I stamped my left foot on the ground & stared at the dead stone.
“You are gonna pay for this!”.
I picked it up & threw it in the road side drainage. Well there was nothing I could have done practically but I satisfied myself. So with a hurt toe & a busy mind I decided to walk back home.

“Windsor Street”.

This was the fourth time I guess. I crossed the road to the other side & joined the crowd in motion. Soon I reached the road to greenery. I used to call it that because it was endowed with green trees on both sides. This road lacked the glimmer of street lamps because of the tall trees. But it didn’t matter much as the path was still clearly visible. One of the lamp post was damaged due to the storm the day before. I kept looking below to dodge any further foot injuries.

Progressing on the road to greenery I think I heard something. So I took a pause & looked around. Surely it was someone talking. Someone very familiar!. I recognized the feeble voice but my mind neglected to accept the thought. It was odd. Still I gazed around to check & recheck. I reached for my cell phone but it was unattended to.

At last I discovered an image in the far corner, near a tree. I decide to move a little closer in order to get a better glance. And there it was,… the familiar image, the familiar voice. Yes! She was there. But?!? Yes it was her. I could sense her beauty in the flickering light passing through the leaves. She looked beautiful as ever. My eyes were fixed on her & maybe I skipped a heartbeat or two. Then my mind came in with the obvious question, ‘What is she doing here, alone??’ Well the latter part was discarded quickly as I saw another figure emerging from the dark corner.

This was a new figure, none that I can recognize. He was standing fairly close to her (My eyebrows frowned). Both were looking at each other in an unusual way. My heart beat jumped to 84 or even 90. I was flabbergasted at the entry of this individual in such a moment.
I knew something was wrong but I didn’t knew how to react in that situation. I felt completely blank, blank like an empty glass(Everything but nothing). In a micro moment he took her hand & looked straight into her eyes(I clenched my fists tightly). The quite environment & the serious moment made me restless.

“What the hell is going on??” I whispered in an angry yet calm voice. The guys lips twitched a little & I rushed to my nearest tree. I could hear his voice in the quite environment.
“I know it has been difficult for the both of us but believe me everything’s gonna be alright.”
Ria sobs.
“Just remember that I will be by your side forever. Whenever & wherever you need me.”
Sobbing faded slowly.
“I know… I know…” replied ria in melancholic tone.

Both remained silent in the moments that followed.
My breathing was heavy & I was trying very hard to listen to any word, any sound. But nothing. I wondered if they were still there or if they just disappeared. I sneaked around the tree to get a glimpse.

‘What the ….!’

For a moment I thought it was one of my mind’s trick. But no. They were hugging each other shamelessly, like lovers do. I reached the state of EXTREME SHOCK. More of shattered than hurt. Betrayal & anger were at their most. My mind flooded with numerous thoughts –
‘She a liar, a manipulator – Slap her in front of this guy – Call her mom & tell her about it – Punch this guy in the face – Snap it & post it on facebook – Call the police!’

But how could she have done something like that to me. Why me?(because I was the other guy?) Why in the world only me? We were in love(Well, I was). What could have possibly gone wrong?
In between these mindless thoughts my ears reacted again.
“Don’t worry. It will all be over very soon.””
“I wish” replied ria with a vapid tone.
“I know I must have told you this many times… but I just want you know that I L. . . …”

I realized what was coming. But I wasn’t prepared to deal with that(not on a casual night walk). I became furious. My mind was not in the state of making decisions. I don’t know what overruled me but in a flick of moment I reacted.
I picked up a fist-sized stone from the ground & threw it in their direction furiously. I didn’t even knew what I was doing & why. As soon as the stone left my hand I turned around and ran, ran as if being chased by a bunch of bulldogs(I hate bulldogs). I was blank & in no state to understand what was happening.

I heard two screams, two high pitched screams. But I kept on running, with a hurt foot and a damaged heart.
I don’t know what really happened but when I regained my senses I was entering my house through the main door.

I hurried towards my room with quick & heavy steps. That seemed the only practical option at that time. I closed the door behind me & gazed at the clock.
’10.20’ it showed.

“Aditya! What happened?”
“Is everything allright?” called my mom in a concerned tone.
“Good night mom” was what I replied to those morbid questions.

I threw my phone on the bed & occupied my chair with the head in my hands. I tried to remember what I had done. Nothing. Nothing at all. No guilt, no anger, no depression, nothing. The emotions were somewhere there deep inside but outside just a stone face. The images of ria & that random guy were flashing before my eyes. Steamed up by the emotional scarcity I punched the table in front of me. Lucky I was as the punch landed on my firm but soft notebook rather than the hard wooden surface.

I gently picked up my notebook & turned around some pages. This notebook had been my oldest friend & the best part was – no complaints, no arguments & no fights. Most of the moments of my life(happy & sad) were inscribed somewhere in between those pages. Turning those pages I realized what I had to do. I decided to pen down my feelings, describing each and every emotion, reliving the nightmare.

This notebook contained various segments of my life & now I was ready to add a new one to it. I picked up a pen from the table & adjusted the notebook on the table. The pen flowed & the words accumulated, emotions revived.

#Notebook

Love unveiled

Love Unveiled

Love and faith are overruled by emerging hate
I can’t help but remember our very first date
The words seems meaningless, emotions hollow
My mouth is full but I can’t swallow
From angel of love to a lover’s kiln
Your picture changed like a moving film
Our moments are fading, losing their charm
The heart is cold but mind still warm
My love
 was pure & so is my heart
But you nailed the bull’s eye with a single dart
Now my love is confused, dying with the moments
And the heart is sinking far from the banks
My soul is hurt, tethered to the fatal blow
And life has suddenly turned into a comedy show
The emotions are shattered, I won’t love again
Back into the grave, I won’t live again….

O Mama!

O Mama!

O Mama! I missed you so much

Your love, affection & your beautiful heart

Far better than the billion stars on earth

I missed your care & magic of spoon

Your canorous lessons like showers of june

It’s absurd how someone can abuse your streak

For what I see is golden hands

Tender heart, oceanic eyes & a divine soul

That lying freely under your protective shade

And those endless chats during my nascent age

O Mama! I missed you. . .

Escape To Nowhere…

Written By: Bhavana Lalwani

Email: blj.jodr@gmail.com

******

She was running…Speedily…without any pause.. She was just running fast. Why, what was the reason? Don’t know, all she knew was that she was running. The way she was running, anyone could reach to a conclusion that she might be in a hurry to reach somewhere, or maybe she was trying to run away from something, but if she wanted to run away then too she was not looking backward. Whatever was it…her speed was quite fast and her breathing was heavy.

That road where she was running was vacant, desolate and quiet. A long and steady road, doesn’t know from where it started off and where it will end up.  Her eyes were looking into a distant vacuum (which was extended on that long road), towards a distant and endless path.

The two things that were breaking the silence of that road were, first, the noise of her running and second her heart beat which was beating so fast that it sounded like an air pump.

Finally, she got tired off, her legs were badly paining, as if someone has squeezed out all their strength. She stopped in the middle of the road, her heart was beating fast, she knelt down a bit and put her hands on the knees, and then again she stood up straight. She looked all around in all possible directions and to that possible extent where her sight could reach. Nothing was there, neither human being nor any other creature nor any green stuff. It was all quiet, empty and sterile.

Then her eyes fell on a big stone, kept on the other side of the road. She walked slowly towards that stone. Her breath was now getting normal. She sat on the stone in a careless position. She locked her hands with each other; her hairs were swinging all over her face, neck and shoulders. She then turned down her face; tightly closed her hands that were already tangled with each other and thereafter two drops of tear dropped from her eyes and flowed down her cheeks….for the  next few moments tears continuously flowed. Then, she suddenly came back in her sense and wiped out the tears and looked around, nobody was there to see her crying. For a moment she felt relaxed.

But on the next moment she couldn’t control herself and once again broke up in tears. Her cry was noiseless, eyes were shading tears, but she did not even scream for a single time. A lump of emotions and grief in her chest were trying to come out with a big bellow, but each time she swallowed them back. She covered her face with hands and closed her lips tightly and folded them inside, but no longer she could keep them in that position; still she succeeded in keeping her tears flowing silent.

She did not know for how long she cried in that manner; all she knows that she cried…. While sitting on that stone.

Finally her tears dried up and she stopped crying. Can’t say whether she got tired off with crying and she did not have anymore strength to cry or there were no more tears left in her eyes. She stood up and took a sigh and started walking back on the road. She was going back to the way from where she came. However, this time her feet were slow, as if there was no hurry to reach anywhere; she was walking carelessly. This time on the road she came across some people, going on their ways; both sides saw each other and moved on their ways respectively.

She was walking slowly…..and  even more slowly as if she did not want to finish the journey, as if she was not willing to reach the destination. However, she reached there and now she was standing outside the house. She opened the main gate in a very slow manner and then closed it with the same pace, so that nobody can listen or notice her arrival. She then entered into the house and looked here and there. Everything was the same and at its place as she left them. Somebody was reading newspaper, someone was watching TV and she could smell the aroma of food being cooked in the kitchen. Nobody noticed her presence nor saw her. She quietly went into her room and fell down on bed and pretended as if she was sleeping. But before entering the room she felt that perhaps somebody asked her, ”where were you, what were you doing?” but those words disappeared in air as soon as they encountered her ears.

Once again two drops emerged at the corners of her eyes and flowing through cheeks, fell on pillow.

Her mother came into the room and stood near her bed,” lunch is ready, will you eat now?” she removed her tears quickly and very cleverly also, then she replied in a stable voice, “No, later, I am not hungry.” She said those words without changing her posture on bed side.  Her mother stood there for few moments and then left the room with mumbling some words that she couldn’t listen clearly or may be she didn’t want to listen.

She came back into her world and again started crying, swallowing own screams and yells, the pillow was getting wet and so was her face.